June 13, 2014 – Wilma was right – it poured today. Too much rain to hunt for worms or look through recycling buckets. Instead, a bunch of us hens got together in the garage to come up with a five-year plan. Not that I want every inch of my life scheduled… I am a free spirit after all. But I did agree that we should each have a couple of goals for which to strive. That’s how Sawyer and I got our license and how Peaches signed up with us for online lessons in the romantic language of swan.
I’ve been feeling restless since we got back from our trip. I’m not looking to span the globe in search of adventure but I do want to do something that zings the strings of my heart. The brewery is going well, our family and friends are great, but I need something to sink my teeth into.
Addie suggested that we try online dating. She wants to go dancing with someone other than us. I questioned her about Bo and Tim. She replied that although she loves them deeply, stepping out with either of the boys would be like dating her own cousin.
“We’re chickens,” I reminded her. “We date our cousins all the time!”
But Addie disregarded my point, choosing instead to stand up and adjust the lay of her pearls and tilt of her light pink pillbox hat.
“I am looking for a mate of continental sophistication,” she declared.
I don’t even know what that means. I thought we were deciding whether or not to learn fly fishing or take cake decorating classes or get on The Family Feud.
There was no time to process what was happening before it became a done deal. The rest of the hens voted unanimously to proceed. The laptop was opened and the enrollment was made. I am now a legitimate member of the online dating service, Cupid’s Coop.com.
Good Lord Almighty, I am not ready for this!
Sawyer laughed, saying that I am dragging my feet. I’m dragging everything! I don’t need anyone else complicating my life but my flockmates. They can’t handle a relationship either! Charlotte and Addie are way too picky to find a match; Wilma could snap a suitor’s head off in the blink of an eye and Peaches already has her pet stick to keep her company.
“Let’s see what tomorrow brings,” Sawyer said wrapping her wing around my shoulder. “This is exciting!”
This is going to crush my style, I can tell. Tomorrow we have to fill out compatibility statements. I think tomorrow is a good day for me to take a long ride on the Vespa. I hear Vermont is quite lovely this time of year.