October 21, 2014 – I was wracking my brain this morning trying to figure out a solution to the issue at the library. I suppose I could try accessing the lending institution in another town… perhaps one in a more rural setting with a sensitivity toward educated-minded farm animals. But the thought of being turned away from my own town made me flush with resentment. This is our home! We were hatched in this hamlet! And as such, we should, by the nature of our birth, be granted a right of entry to the public library.
I unwrapped a piece of pink bubblegum and began to knead it between my beak. Think rationally, I told myself. As I calmed down, I realized that my fight was not with the townspeople or the library itself. There was only one person responsible for our having to slink around the library premises like a pack of hooligans… Eunice. The trick was to either win her over, or make her believe that she would be better suited in an out-of-state bibliotheca. My preference was the former, since I am a lover, not a hater. If we decide to approach the ill-mannered bookworm, it will be her reaction that determines the next step.
I blew a significant bubble and was admiring my handiwork when Peaches and Sawyer sat down on the thinking logs next to me. I handed them each a piece of gum and waited for them to make it pliable before sharing my thoughts.
“I want this resolved, but I want it done with class and dignity,” I stated.
“Yah,” Peaches agreed. “I can see how a dress coat filled with three levels of hen might be unnerving. Though, in our defense, the woman did yell, HIT THE FLOOR!”
Sawyer chuckled. “So, what do you think we should do?”
I scratched my head with my foot. “I think we should request a face-to-face and talk it out with Eunice in private.”
“But we’ll never make it past the circulation desk without her throwing a date stamp at us. How are you going to get her to agree to a meeting?”
Sawyer made an excellent point, but I was a step ahead of her.
“I’m going to ask Lola, the other librarian, for help. I’ll arrange a meeting outside of the library – the supermarket, or a restaurant.”
“Ooh… not a restaurant,” warned Peaches. “Too close to a kitchen for my taste. Why don’t you have Lola invite her to the bowling alley? Or better yet, why don’t you have Mom invite her to the house for lunch? That way she can see us in our natural habitat.”
Sawyer glanced at me with a raised eyebrow. It wasn’t a bad idea. Not at all. I’d have to first find out if Mom knows Eunice personally. If she doesn’t, we’ll need a reason for the lunch date.
“I can work with this,” I said snapping my gum like a pop top. “I’ll chat with Mom in the morning. Then let’s meet back here to strategize.”
The three of us shook wings on the plan before Sawyer asked, “so… has anyone heard from Rosemary today? I don’t know how long it takes to recover from a milk leak like that, but I imagine she is wiped.”
“I checked in with Trudy first thing this morning,” I replied. “She said that Rosie is resting comfortably and is feeling much better after treating herself to some apple butter salve. She did however, experience a couple of night terrors. Visions of the wild woman with milk-soaked hair. I don’t think we’ll ever get her back inside an elevator.”
“As long as Rosemary is healthy and able to produce,” said Sawyer. “That’s all the matters.”
“I agree wholeheartedly,” Peaches exclaimed. “Otherwise, she’d be a milk dud.”
Then Peaches fell off her thinking log in a fit of laugher. That hen can crack herself up like nobody’s business!